Thursday, March 27, 2008

coward...

I feel that I'm a coward...
I used to feel fearless...
Thinking that ordeals in life are but tests of my resilience...
Keeping in mind that Impossible is nothing...
now, I find myself walking on the spot..
dare not put myself in the arena of unknown...
that one step that I know will take me further was not taken..
because I know that this is a make-it-or-break-it situation...
All these acts of cowardice and dastardliness made me all weary and tired...
All I can do is occupy my body and minds in useless entertainment..
I need courage...

I learnt that one of my very good friend is probably going astray in life,
I do not understand...
maybe it's my cowardly behavior that deters me from doing similar things in life..
I feels that there are things that are strictly no-nos,
places that are rigidly out-of-bound...
Standing by my principles,
I wish my friends doesn't do things bad for themselves...
even more so when they knows such things shouldn't be done in the first place...
I fathom that people do make their own choices,
but ain't there better things to do...

This world is increasing in its complexity, something that I could not grasp...

To conclude, there's no conclusion...


Saturday, March 15, 2008

rainy... raining!!

today is the day for impromptu actions...
i booked my air tickets to HK,
went for a swim..
cooked pasta (that was surprisingly good) for me and my mum...
well, did things on impulse,
but still, not enough to start on my assignment....
now its raining... why??
making me feeling all nostalgic...
(guess that's just an excuse for me to procrastinate once again....)

Friday, March 14, 2008

i need more energy...

today, had a mini poly class gathering...
was fun and interesting knowing how each individual is getting on in life,
finally saw jiaqin...
since like a couple years ago i went to her 21st bday celebration...
i guess we were really close in poly, that why even till now i still sense a bond between us...
felt that all of us grew up..
in one way or another...
even most of my guy classmates had completed NS...
my only exclamation is that time really flies..

today, once again feel the energy new low...
not that anything actually happened..
but i just can't muster enough motivation to start on my assignment...
which is due in like 10 days time...
hai...
i'm so dead!! help....
part time studies realli rely alot on determination and discipline...
i tink i have a discipline-deficiency syndrome...
argh!!!

dead dead dead dead dead!!!!!!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

new me...

i realised something...
being kind or giving is not a exactly a virtue, rather, a burden.
not that i am anyway.
people take you for granted,
take advantage of you,
and u ended in in a more dire situation than your 'helpless' friend.
like my friend...
therefore, i told her...
u r saving up your money to let other people spend it...

nuthin much, just wanna rant about how ppl ended up borrowing money from others to satisfy one's desire for what... a motorbike...
i only feel that if u have no money,
to quote from a chinese proverb
'don't slap yourself till your face is swollen to feign a fatty'. (direct translation)

Monday, March 10, 2008

Cam-whoring...


i always loved taking photos very much...
dying to learn more about photography...
yeah~!
I went to the IT Show 2008 @ Suntec with Gil, WeiJie, Malcolm yesterday, before work.
Boy... it was packed to the brim... but some very imconsiderate people tends to prefer to stand in the middle of the walkway, and start talking about their life-story... Bizzare, indeed.
Being a 'Crowdophobic' person, it was tremendously tormenting for me to stay there for long.
after much queueing and thinking, i finally bought my Fujifilm Z10fd at $259.
army green... just the way i like it...
wanted pink though, coz it looks cute, havent owned anything pink as yet... but, a pity it was sold out.
had a round of monopoly and went to K-Box jus now...
busy cam-whoring and of coz, my all-time favourite pastime - Singing!
now, i'm so tired that i feel very motivated to type faster and finish this entry...!
good niteZ... cheers~!

Saturday, March 08, 2008

my plan...

went to IT show with Jerry, Gil and Weijie on Friday...
all of them managed to get something...
except for me and Gil... haha
so, i'm going again later...

Fujifilm Z5fd/ Z10fd
here i come...
should i go for quality or bargain...?
fantastic night shots or free memory cards, tripod, batteries etc etc...?

*sigh* caught in a dilemna...
hm... MP3 player, i wan too but dun tink so...
thumbdrive mayb...
instead of my ancient 256mb thumbdrive...

full of anticipation for the upcoming trip...
but somehow i have a bad inkling reagarding the trip...
will it be last minute cancelled...??
will it be f-up...
i dunno...
sometimes human beings are just programmed to tink too much...


new low...

hm... hit rock bottom...
i had always believed that everyone has their hidden talent...
juz kip searching and u'll find it...

todAy is a sucky day at work...
i dunno is it my PMS at work or wad...

i said, i dunno i'm well-liked or well-disliked...
y is it that i muz be the object of everyone's mockery...
is it so funny..??
i noe ppl dun mean it...
i dun mind harmless jokes...
never mind them in fact...
but i tink everyone has a certain threshold when it comes to tis kinda stuffs...
mayb u'll tink it's trivial...
i feel darn insulted...
not abt personal attacks,
but dun make my physical appearance the reason u tink i cant work properly...

i told gil, mayb i should go to a more serious workplace,
den i wun have to withstand all this insults...
harmless, it may be to u...
but hurtful, it is... to me.

i now dread work,
coz i dunno wad's the next joke to resolve around me gonna be like...

i'm always trying my best at work,
i dunno why is it that ppl choose to ignore and focus on how clumsy/funny/helmet/fender i look like...

i suddenly remember my literature teacher once said,
'the heart is willing but the flesh is weak..'